Fear of the dentist: where it comes from and how to overcome it, step by step

Where fear of the dentist comes from, why putting off the dentist leads to bigger treatment, simple steps that help, what we do to keep your visit calm and how to talk to a child who is scared.

Fear of the dentist is common and can be explained

Dental anxiety is very common and nothing to be ashamed of: people of all ages have it, and it says nothing about how brave you are. It almost always has a specific cause:

• an unpleasant experience in the past, often in childhood;
• the noise and vibration of the drill;
• fear of the injection;
• the feeling of losing control: you are lying back with your mouth open and can't speak;
• embarrassment about the state of your teeth and fear of being told off;
• fear of a large bill that you only find out about at the end.

Why putting it off makes treatment bigger

A small cavity can be dealt with in one short visit. Left for months or years, it reaches the nerve and turns into root canal treatment, then a crown, sometimes an extraction. Many patients only come in when the pain leaves them no choice, and treating an inflamed tooth is exactly the experience they were afraid of. That's how a vicious circle forms: fear leads to putting things off, putting things off leads to bigger treatments, and those lead to even more fear. The circle can be broken: a visit with no pain, followed by a small filling done without any unpleasantness, gradually changes what you expect from the dentist.

Scared of the dentist? What you can do

• Tell us from the start. When you book, on the phone or in the online form, tell us you are anxious. The dentist will plan their time differently and won't rush you.
• A first visit just to talk. At a consultation (250 lei) we talk, and the dentist examines your teeth and explains what they have found. No treatment is done unless you want it.
• A stop signal. Agree a simple signal with the dentist, such as raising your left hand: when you make it, we stop immediately. Knowing that you can stop the treatment takes away a lot of the tension.
• Short sessions. A bigger treatment can be split into several short visits.
• A calm time of day. Choose the morning or a time when you won't be in a rush.
• Headphones with music. Music or a podcast covers up the sounds of the clinic.
• Bring someone with you. Having someone close come with you is more reassuring than you might think.
• Slow breathing. Breathe in through your nose for a count of four and breathe out slowly for a count of six. A few minutes of slow breathing calms the body.

What we do to keep your visit calm

We explain each step before we do it: what comes next, how long it takes and what you will feel. We don't start anything you haven't understood and agreed to. We don't judge the state of your teeth: we often see teeth that haven't been treated for years, and our job is to find the simplest way to sort them out. At the consultation with a treatment plan (330 lei) you receive the stages and the price of each in writing, so there are no surprises at the end.

Effective dental anaesthetic, given gently

Many patients are more afraid of the injection than of the treatment. Today's local anaesthetic is effective, and the dentist gives it gently: working slowly, waiting for it to take effect and checking the area before starting. If you feel anything during treatment, tell us and we'll top it up. The anaesthetic costs 70 lei. Your lip, cheek or tongue may stay numb for a few hours; until then, don't eat anything or drink anything hot, so you don't bite or burn yourself without feeling it. With children, make sure your little one doesn't bite their numb lip.

Drill-free treatment with the laser

At our clinic, many cavities are treated with the Er:YAG dental laser: without the noise and vibration of the drill and, for small and medium cavities, often without an injection. The laser removes only the diseased tissue. A laser filling costs 350 lei for a small cavity, 600 lei for a medium one and 750 lei for a large one. The laser isn't suitable for every case, and at the consultation we'll tell you honestly what can be treated without the drill in your teeth.

Children afraid of the dentist

Children aren't born afraid of the dentist; they often learn it, from a first visit that involved pain or from grown-ups' stories. That's why we start with a get-to-know visit, with no unpleasant procedures at all: your child gets to know the clinic, the chair and the dentist. The consultation or get-to-know visit costs 100 lei. At home, a few simple rules help:

• talk about the dentist in an ordinary tone, as you would about any other visit;
• put things positively: “the dentist is going to count your teeth” is more reassuring than “it won't hurt”;
• if you are scared yourself, let the calmer parent go with them: little ones pick up on adults' emotions straight away;
• don't promise big rewards in advance, as if something difficult were coming; praise them afterwards for being brave;
• let the dentist talk directly to your child; if they don't want to today, we'll try again another time, without forcing anything.

When fear becomes a phobia

For some people, fear of the dentist is more than nerves. If for years you haven't managed to book an appointment even though you are in pain, if you have panic attacks, nausea or dizziness at the mere thought of a visit, or you can't sleep the nights before, it may be a phobia. It's then worth talking to a psychologist or your GP. Dental phobia can be treated, usually with cognitive behavioural therapy and gradual exposure, and after therapy many patients manage to have the treatment they need.

When you can't put it off any longer

If a tooth hurts and you're scared, call us and tell us both things: in an emergency we deal with the pain first and plan the rest together. A fever, swelling that keeps growing or difficulty swallowing or breathing are medical emergencies, however: call 112 or go straight to the nearest hospital emergency department.

Frequently asked questions